Friday, August 23, 2013

A Long Time Gone

I've been remiss. I've been lazy. I've been thinking, not doing.
I've been a long time gone from the blog.  I've been making big plans, rebuilding bridges and coming to terms.

Let's start with the big plans.

I read somewhere that you're not supposed to tell people you're writing a book.  Or maybe you're just not supposed to tell them what it's about.  I forget.  I'll split the difference:  I'm writing some anecdotal stuff that might one day be bound into sequential pages and (hopefully) enjoyed by millions.  My fear is that no one will be interested in what I have to say.  But as a wise person once said, "Only you can tell your story."  It may be presumptuous, but I think that means I am obligated to put words on paper.  There.  Big plans.

Now to those bridges.

I really hate the word "estranged."  It sounds so legal, cold and noncommittal.  Definition: no longer close or affectionate to someone; alienated.


No matter how I feel about the word, it kind of fits the situation.  I have been "away" from certain family members for a very long time.  They are amazing, kind and generous people.  So why the distance?  Because I am foolish.  My folly was fearing they would be upset with my choices.  Turns out, they think I'm pretty great, too!  Long story short, we're all getting to know each other again and it's awesome!


Which leads me to the terms I'm coming to...

I am restless.  I get that way easily.  I have no idea where it comes from, this wanderlust.  If I don't have some sort of scenery shift every so often, I get bored and cranky.  That being said, I'm going on three years in Cleveland, and I can feel the wind of change stirring.
I have this wide-eyed notion that the world is a big ole place and I haven't seen enough of it.  And it's not enough just to see it, I have to immerse.  I tend to look at places and think, "could I live here?"

But since it ain't broke, I'm resisting the urge to fix it.  I'm coming to terms with the fact that I am exactly where I'm meant to be right now.  I really don't have any reason to roll out.  I have great friends, a good job, a delightful farmer's market just down the street, and the weather can't be beat! 

I'm home.  For now.

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